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26 June 2005 @ 09:54 am

Unlike the last time, I didn't run out of the hotel this time. Not that I'd actually been capable of running the last time I was here, but still. It was funny when one realized that I could run now. Well, funny might not be the word for it. But it was a rather big change. When I past the stairs I did quicken my pace. The only reason for that being that I was afraid Faith might've changed her mind and might come down again. I still didn't trust her, and I doubt I'll ever will. Nor would I ever forget.

How Cordelia did it, I don't know. It was quite puzzling the way she had taken Faith under her proverbial wing. I didn't understand but I wasn't about to think about it to closely. That would probably only lead to more confusion. How could I work with the woman who gleefully carved in my flesh? Among other things. I can still feel my bones break, I can still feel the hot poker burn my skin, I still can't really feel my arm where she stabbed the glass. I knew I was going to have to talk to Faith. But...how to even begin that?

Then there was Angel. A vampire. The one thing I'd been brought up to kill since birth. It was so ingrained that my fist reaction was to dust him on sight. But...he has a soul. This wasn't something I'd been taught to deal with. Hell, I doubt the council even really knows about the Scourge of Europe having a soul. Not to mention that he's quite confusing on his own. I've no idea if he really wanted me to stay, or only said because Cordelia made him.

But it would give me a purpose. As much as I love translation work for the museum, it's not my passion. Demons are. Finding out about them, studying them. Fighting evil is what I've been brought up to do. No matter how clumsy. It makes me feel better when I've made the world a saver place by ridding it of one of the foe's of evil. And perhaps they can really suse a researcher. It would give me a very good opportunity to keep a close eye on Cordelia.

The only real reason I have for staying. She and I have bonded since that night Faith had us both tied up. We shared something no one else had. Fear, pain, panic and...hope. Hope of getting out of there alive. We were each other's hope. I don't want to loose my hope. Hope that this life of mine me not as be as pointless as I previously believed. I don't know. I just need to think about this a lot. Weigh down the pro's and con's. Thus far there aren't that many pro's.

Sighing, I parked the bike outside Cordelia's apartment. The one she wants back. Damn, I liked her apartment. And I was very much enjoying Dennis company. We even established a ritual. Watch Jerry Springer together and our evening game of chess. Now if only he'd be a little less of a mother hen, things would be jolly good. But, it was her apartment. And I'm sure Dennis would prefer to have Cordelia back as well.

More choices.

The moment I opened the door, a cold wind whirled around me. "I'm fine, Dennis." I smiled and shook my head. Worrywart. Who'd ever heard of such a worrying ghost? There was a tapping sound and I looked up to see him float a picture of Cordelia up and down. "Cordy is fine too," I assured him. Dropping my keys on the table, I sank down on the sofa with a deep sigh. Which was followed by a floating glass of water and a bottle of medication. Growling I plucked them out of the air, glared at the room in general and the dutifully swallowed them.

"Monopoly?" I blinked and pushed up my glasses when Dennis floated the board game over. Frowning I watched wearily as he set up the game in record time and then impatiently tapped the board with the dice. "Alright," I shrugged, trowing them and starting the game. I guess he was really worried today if he doesn't even feel like playing chess.

Well, it looks as though I'm going to have a nice evening of playing Monopoly. With a ghost.

Could my life get any stranger?